Today, I recalled how many years ago there were scores of things happening in the lives of those I counsel/mentor that I was at the precipice of disengaging myself from what I AM called and chosen to do.

I felt like TOO MUCH was going on: parenting my lads, who were bullied and experiencing peer pressure, to other mothers facing life-and-death situations, to being called a snitch for advocating for the safety of an entire school community – I needed a break. So, I took that break; a moment to regroup; a moment to let the Holy Spirit inhale and exhale through me; a moment to quiet myself and be revived, to finish what I started.

During this quiet time, I realized that as mentors, sometimes we tend to become excessively involved to the measure that our involvement turns into ineffectiveness. Although this ineffectiveness does not always appear unproductive to the mentee, we mentors see it. Thus, we must have moments of silence. Not to signify that we lack interest and don’t care, but to keep productivity for the cause in a rewarding condition. When embracing this time of silence, we should not retreat without notice. They are already fragile, most of the time, and to walk away without explanation can further their insecurities.

My method of mentoring in silence includes not availing myself of F2F (face-to-face) or via telephone interaction but via email or social media, on occasion. These restrictions allowed me to maintain control of my silent space and maintain a measure of effectiveness. And, again, we all need silence: not to reject but to recuperate.

I was just now gently reminded how Jesus, during the time of betrayal by one of His mentees (disciples), took time to go to a particular place and pray. He said to His disciples, “Sit HERE while I go and pray YONDER. And then, Jesus went a little FARTHER, fell on His face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless, not as I will, but as thou wilt” (Matthew 26:36,39, KJV). The HERE, YONDER, and FARTHER were measures of separation between them (His mentees [disciples]) and Him while He prayed. This act of separation was a time to weep and release: a time to come to terms with what is required of the journey ahead: a time of preparation to finish what He started.

As Jesus was on that day, so are many of us mentors. SELAH! Let us continue to use our silent space to restore and equip us to finish what we’ve been called and chosen to accomplish.

©October 28, 2013, Angela M. Smith (Nataph)